Ok, so one of my female friends came to see me this weekend & brought her "boyfriend" for me to meet him. After she got back home she sent me a text saying "So what do you think?" & honestly, I was surprised she cared. I was surprised that she cared what I thought about him, & surprised that she was actually eager to know my response. So I texted her back "...He seems cool, just take it easy & be careful." One of our other friends said that she felt like he may be somewhat sneaky, or what not & told her to be careful as well. I responded & said, thats with everyone... "you have to be careful with everyone."
Later on in the conversation it also made me realize somethings. I was telling her that she doesn't need to do too much, I told her to just relax, take each day at a time, don't get too deep, & don't do the most. When I told her that, it had me thinking about the females that I know who are completly opposite of this, the females that DO the most & GIVE their everything when the guy they are with could give two sh*ts less. So this brings me to my main point, why is marriage absent in 2011?
I am going to try & make this as short & simple as possible, bare with me...
Females, we have the tendency to love a lot, & when we love, we usually love hard. We are emotional creatures & most of us have really big hearts. The thing about that is when you love hard, you sometimes do things that don't need to be done. We get so caught up in the relationship that we start doing things that we don't even realize until later on. We start cooking every night, trying new things to keep his attention, changing all the things he doesn't like, becoming that "ride or die" just so he knows your'e down for him, etc. Hell, I even found myself going to his apartment, cooking & cleaning at his house, I had to sit back & be like "Woah! WTF are you doing Victoria?!!?" Don't get me wrong, doing all of these things are great, actually perfect! The only problem, is that may be your boyfriend, but he isn't you "Husband". Why are you giving so much? In a nutshell, Im saying...
"If you do EVERYTHING for your boyfriend.....why would marriage even cross his mind? Girl, you giving him it all WITHOUT a ring already!"
Im going to keep it real, if I was a guy, about 27 years old & I had this amazing girl that cooked, cleaned, did this & that for me...I wouldn't even think about getting married to her either. I might love her & love the things she do, but whats the point of going through that marriage process when I got everything already? That is why a lot of guys say "nothing would change, getting married is just a ring & a piece of paper"
So to end this post, Ladies, if you want to continue to do what you want for your man & give him everything, not letting him even think about what would come after marriage, then who am I to judge, keep doing you. But just think about it, if he isn't giving as much as you are, then yall shouldn't be together anyway. While you are home being "wifey" & he is out doing him, he could care less about all that other sh*t. He may come home to you at night, but are you that less of a woman to let him be with the whole city before he come home to you? Think about it...
